Who writes telemarketing scripts?
I’ve been learning a lot about copywriting lately by listening to some of the world’s best copywriters namely John Carlton, and Gary Halbert. I’ve read a number of books on the subject of sales and selling and marketing. Though I wouldn’t consider myself to be a good copywriter I have developed a sense of what qualifies as good.
Why is it that telemarketers have the lamest scripts of all. Someone must be the professional copywriter that pens those things before handing them to the people that actually do the calls. It’s as if they’ve broken every rule about good marketing. I hope they get fired.
The last telemarketing call I got was for an identity protection program that costs $15/month. The script was lame, uninteresting, and felt like they were taking my attention and wasting it. It was 5 long minutes that I’ll never get back.
If I were writing the copy for such a sale it would go something like this:
Hello, I’m looking for [First name]
–
Hi Mr/Ms [Lastname] I’m [callers first name] calling on behalf of [business name]. Have you heard of Identity Theft?
Identity theft is a growing threat that many of our customers are worried about and I want to share with you some FREE TIPS that you can do right now to help protect yourself against identity theft. We value you as a customer and it’s in our best interest as well as yours to prevent identity theft. I have FOUR really simple things that you can start doing today to reduce your risks.
First, when you’re throwing bills, receipts and invoices in the garbage, make sure you use a paper shredder. Identity theives can get a lot of information about you from your garbage, names, addresses, phone numbers, and bank account information found in the garbage could be used to create fake documents and steal your identity.
Second, only buy things online from reputable sites. Ensure that the page you punch your credit card information into is encrypted and that you trust the site to be able to keep your information safe. Hackers have on several occasions over the last years broken into website databases and downloaded hundreds of thousands of credit card numbers. Making many accounts vulnerable to fraudulent charges.
Third, use cash. Recently sophisticated criminals have been swapping out point of sale keypads for ones that have been modified to record all the card information that gets swiped. Make sure that credit card and bank card keypads are either fixed to the counter or have another way that would prevent someone from switching keypads.
Lastly, [business name] is offering its GOOD customers a program that will actively search for fraudulent charges, and newly issued credit cards under your name among other things in order to keep your identity under your control. Since starting this program we’ve identified [insert number] identity thefts in progress before any damage was done to our customers. We’ll also throw in a copy of your credit report and give you a consulting call with a credit expert so you can ask questions about improving your credit score, or anything else regarding your credit score or report. We’re offering this today FREE for the first 60 days and after that we’ll have to charge you $14.95 per month because it’s not easy to stay one step ahead of the criminals and we have an excellent team devoted to keeping you safe. If you’re interested, I’ll just have to confirm your address so we can send you your free information package in the mail which should arrive by [5 business days from today]
Can I confirm your mailing address and get this sent out to you today?
…
Hell, I might have bought it with that script.
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My name is Sam and I am a telemarketer. I am writing my own scripts because of the lame scripts ive been asked to use. I really like the idea of your script well done. I we worked it a bit to fit my style and particular product, and i just wanted to share it with you.
Hello, is [customer name] there?
–
Hi Mr/Ms [Lastname] I’m [Sam Blackshaw] calling on behalf of citibank, the issuer of your [card type] credit card.
I’m sure you’ve probably heard about identity theft. Identity theft is a growing threat that many of our customers are worried about and I want to share with you some FREE TIPS that you can do right now to help protect yourself against identity theft. We value you as a customer and it’s in our best interest as well as yours to prevent identity theft. I have FOUR really simple things that you can start doing today to reduce your risks.
First, when you’re throwing bills, receipts and invoices in the trash, make sure you use a paper shredder. Identity theives can get a lot of information about you from your trash, names, addresses, phone numbers, and bank account information found in the trash could easily be used to create fake documents and steal your identity.
Second, only buy things online from reputable sites. Ensure that the page you punch your credit card information into is secured by looking for H.T.T.P.S. at the start of the sites address. Hackers have on several occasions over the last years broken into website databases and downloaded hundreds of thousands of credit card numbers. Making many accounts vulnerable to fraudulent charges.
Third, use cash. Recently sophisticated criminals have been swapping out point of sale keypads for ones that have been modified to record all the card information that gets swiped. Make sure that credit card keypads are either fixed to the counter or have another way that would prevent someone from switching out keypads.
Lastly, CitiBank is offering its customers a wonderful protection plan called Citi Identity Monitor that will actively search for fraudulent charges, newly issued credit cards, and new accounts under your name among other things in order to keep your identity under your control. Since starting Identity Monitor we’ve identified THOUSANDS of identity thefts in progress before any damage was done to our customers. We’ll also throw in a copy of your credit report so you can check for fraudulent activity and give you a consulting call with a credit expert so you can ask questions about improving your credit score, or anything else regarding your credit score or report. It does include many other great benefits. We’re offering this today for just a dollar the first 30 days and if you chose to continue with it it’s only $12.95 per month, but that is entirely your decision, because you can cancel at anytime by simply calling our toll free number, which will be included in your materials. All we ask is that your try it out for a dollar. We have an excellent team devoted to keeping you one step ahead of the criminals. If you’re interested, I’ll just have to confirm your name and address so we can send you your credit report and Identity Monitor materials for just a dollar for the first 30 days which won’t actually start until you receive your package in 2 - 3 weeks . Would that be okay?
if yes: Great! This will just take a moment of your time.
if no: May I ask why you wouldnt be interested in protecting your identity?